As most of us know life can get in the way of our dreams and things have to be put on the back burner until further notice. That is what happened with my college dream. This has all changed now. I have talked about college for several years but was never really sure what is I wanted to do and since I would be paying for this I didn't not want to enroll without a major set in place. Towards the end of 2011 I decided now was the time. My boys are getting older and more self-sufficient on their own and I kind of thought it was time for me to have something I wanted to do. I was accepted into IVY Tech Community College and after all the hoops I had to jump thru to get financial aid today was my first day.
Up until last Thursday I never thought this was a selfish idea. I knew I have lived my life basically for everyone else and especially for my kids and knew college was right for me. But last week I cried at least 2 days because I started to realize that I was giving up everything and everyone I loved and adored to be selfish and think of myself. Yes I do know that this is not a selfish decision but if you truly know me you will understand why I feel this way. Nothing is more important to me than my two boys and the thought of not always being around when they need me to be hit me pretty hard. Plus I don't consider myself to have that many friends but I do have a select few that mean so much to me and I knew I would see them even less than my children. After much encouragement from so many dear people I got over this, well at least at this moment. I fully expect this to hit me again especially the first time I miss something pertaining to my kids. And if I'm being honest I want to cry right now as I write this because I know I am going to miss at least 3 of Robbie's swim meets.. Onto my first day experience now.
The alarm sounded at 5 am today. I knew I had to be ready before I got Evan up at 6 am to get him ready for school. The morning was pretty uneventful expect my nerves were getting the best of me. I did eat breakfast, which I don't normally do, and stopped to get me a drink. I got to Lafayette about 40 minutes early and sat in my van. When I finally went inside I was a ball of nerves...my hands were shaking. I started to sweat and seriously thought I need to go back home. You cannot do this! You are too old! What were you thinking?
My first class starts at 8:30 am and its MATH... Not sure what I was thinking there... I hate math!! And I of course panicked because I just keep telling myself I'm going to fail this course. The kicker is this is a math refresher course not even my college math I have to take for my degree. The time seemed to pass rather quickly and the professor seems okay. He had us introduce ourselves and the person next to me is some 20 year old KID.. And he was texting during class. Probably going to have to move seats! I got homework that is due for Wednesday and we have a quiz that day. Arrgghhh...
Second class is English and this is not a refresher course. The professor seems very strict and that same kid is in this class. I think it should be interesting to see if they butt heads.. :) I walked out of that class being very intimidated and thinking I'm not quite prepared for it but we shall see. Oh and with some more homework. She did an ice breaker and had us introduce ourselves then say 2 truths and 1 lie out loud. I said my name. I have 2 boys, love watching football and have had 5 major surgeries since birth. Can you guess which one is the lie?
Third class is Sociology. The professor is a 65 year old former Catholic nun. She is a riot! I will probably like this class the most. She went over the rules (which they did in every class) and then went over a book list to which we have to choose one of the books and read it then she gives us a test on it. This was a full page of books and she has read them all and was able to tell us detail information about all but one. I was impressed! I love to read but can honestly say I don't always retain what I have read. There are times I will read a book a couple of times to make sure I understood it correctly. But I will say I had already read at least 2 of the books that were on the list. I left here with some more homework but I am looking forward to this class.
Last class of the day is Community College Success.. Everyone has to take this at IVY. I was told by my Academic Advisor as long as you show up to class you will be able to pass it. This class also sounds interesting but by this class I was getting tired and my shoulders hurt so bad from all the heavy books I was carrying around all day long. The professor for this class is very encouraging. We did introductions and then she asked what our major was and when I said mine she said that I should have no problem getting a job and that she had a student last semester that got a job before they graduated. I sure hope that’s me. And you guessed it I have homework for this class also!
So in the end "It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be and yes I stressed for nothing"... (That is for my friend Charlie.) I rewarded myself with an actual backpack that won't kill my shoulder and Luca Pizza for lunch. Now I must go and start my endless hours of homework!
Many thanks to my family and friends who have started this journey with me and I know will help me thru it! I love each and every one of you!
3 comments:
I predict you will learn to like math, express yourself well in English (they are always strict the first day because of the young kids who text in class...but don't worry)and Sociology was one of my favorite classes too! Highlight your assignments in your syllabus so you can see them quickly.
I also predict you will want a roller bag before the semester is over! Ask if they rent lockers. Oh yes, the kid who is texting will either flunk out or drop out. Class sizes usually drop in half by the 3rd week. Only the serious show up for every class.
And...too old for college??? Please! You've got 10 yr on me and I am thinking of going back again soon.
I love you! Enjoy your college experience. Stock up on sticky notes, highlighters, and coffee.
Sounds like you had a good finish to a scary start. Glad you hung in there. Your going to do great my favorite niecey!! You got this! *hugs*
So excited for you, Leslie, you're getting to have your college adventure! Enter every classroom with an open mind, and never decide that anything is 'too hard', nothing is too hard if you give it time and attention, you have the skills to learn, and so you can learn anything!
You are still the same wife and mother that you were yesterday, that's not going to change, and it will be good for your boys to watch you take on this challenge and fight for your successes - how else would your sons learn about thse things if not by watching their awesome Momma?
Work hard, of course, but don't forget to have FUN, too!
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